March Hottness Pedro Bracket

Its time again when 4 mediocre looking guys judge incredibly hot women to try and raise their own self esteem while they clubber down on their looks.... Here is my 2010 March Hotness Bracket

(#1) Coco (Ice-T's Wife) : This chick has been dominating my downtime jacktime for a few months now, she looks like a walking animation from Heavy Metal, the chick is banging. This chick is swollen in all the right spots, keeps up with her fitness and still encourages ugly motherfuckers that if you have money...you can nail anything you want.

(#16) Lindsay Lohan : Oh what a sexy train wreck she has been, I remember when she was in SNL doing the Harry Potter skit and I was all into her but now this chick has dwindled so far as apperaring topless for a 5 second clip trailer for Machete  and 1 second for a Parisian Cologne. Oh skanky Lilo, you are barely in this tourney, you are the #3 reason i no longer look forward for girls to turn of age (1 & 2 are the Olsen Twins)

BLOWOUT VICTORY : Coco Advances

(#8) Andressa Soares (Mulher Melancia): This Brazilian booty beauty has been solid on my playlist. Her Ass looks like something an evil scientist created to distract all heterosexual males and take over the world. Brazil's major export is Soccer, Hot Big Ass Females and Aids. IF you get a chance find any clip you can of her on youtube, sure its in portugese but once she moves that ass it translate into the universal jacking language.

(#9) Vanessa Ferlito : I came across this beauty way back in the Sopranos, then she really got me in the Tarantino snoozefest Deathproof, when she did a lap dance that couldve made that movie tolerable. The fact is im into chicks with Crazy Mouth, she looks like Michelle Rodriguez if Michelle Rodriguez didnt look like a butch dike but a regular respectable lesbian.

Andressa Soares Advances in a buzzer beater, If Ferlito has some sort of a body she couldve been something...get those implants mama.

(#5) Anna Paquin (Sookie) : Oh my how this girl has grown, On season 2 you get to check ouot what Sookie is packing and she is packing a fierce body on her but the goddam Michael Strahan gap tooth thing really makes this 8 look like a 6 when she smiles.

(#12) Snookie (Jersey Shore) : This chick is the perfect representation of Italian-American Upstate New York Whores...I know I dated one chick from the same town as Snookie, as a matter of fact shes a teacher at the same high school Snookie graduated from, not only that she looks almost like Snookie, and no its not Snookie. The Hottests Moment of Snookie wasnt her cartwheel or her constant making out with strangers...it was when Snookie got punched, this chick can take a solid wallop and didnt bruise that fat fuck face of hers.

UPSET Snookie advances past Sookie .... Im sorry im still not over my ex.

(#4) Heidi Montag 2.0 : Ive never seen one episode of the Hills but this annoying bitch as been popping on TMZ for years with her douchebag husband trying to be famous. Then a miracle happened, she got DD's and modified her face to look like something i can tolerate as long as she doesnt speak, she would be the perfect woman if the doctors had the balls to slice her vocal cords but she isas close to perfect we can dream.

(#13) Katy Perry : Your Hot and your Cold, your in and your out, you are the most inconsistant thing ive ever seen. you have pictures where you looks amazing and pics where you looks homely, Then you got engaged to Russell Brand and this ruined anything i liked about you and him. You ruin everything

Heidi Montag 2.0 moves closer to being a real celebrity, Katy Perry piss off!

(#6) Lady Gaga : This chick not only puts out good banging music when your rolling on ecstasy (if you got the hook up let me know) but she is very cute when she performs. Notice i said cute, because she isnt all that attractive  only from behind when her face isnt in the way, but she does entertain me for her Airport fashion sense, my favorite two treebranches coming out of her head an ode to Sonny Bono.

(#11) Ke$ha : tik tok girl, wont stop biting of my girl Lady Gaga. Sorry Epic Fail, i like your look of crazy bitch who doesnt brush her hair, but im pretty sure she has a nappy pussy and it smells like Little Saigon on garbage pick up day. Dont try so hard, good luck next year

Lady Gaga moves past this Clone with ease.

(#3) J Woww (Jersey Shore) : She is by far the hottest thing  on that show, any girl that says "Tits are coming out" as a prelude to a night out is a-ok with me, not only is she hot, she dont give a shit and will scrap with anyone male or female...god damn it i miss New York (the city not the black chick)

(#14) Michelle Bombshell (Bullock killer) : Late entry but when i saw this chick im like she has to go in! She is tattoed all over, even the face (minus!) has a swastika tattoo and white power tattoos (plus!) but the lack of a tattoo featuring jesus riding a dinosaur in a cowboy hat makes this Oscar Winner Homewrecker a  first round flop.

I cant believe im typing this but J-Woww's classiness wins out over Bombshell.

(#7) Kari Ann Peniche : Theres something that attracts me to crazy bitches, specially ones with substance abuse and sexual addiction, also attractive about this chick is how Cunty she can be to people who are trying to help her thru her addiction. There are times I wish Snookie's assailant would make an apperance and punch this twat right in her face, because if she can take a punch...im leaving Lisa.

(#10) Erin Andrews: boo hoo i got videotaped walking naked in my hotel room, boo hoo i want justice, boo hoo? Dancing with the Stars is calling me? boo hoo?? Im now considered a celebrity, oh man this is awesome! boo hoo! fuck you stalker you ruined my life, boo hoo Tuesdays on ABC.

Kari Ann Paniche not only moves on but has a threesome video with the noxema girl, take that below mediocre sideline reporter.

(#2) Casey Anthony : Well, well , well Americans favorite Pro Choice activist has not only maintained her looks while being locked up for almost a year, but continues to look hotter at every court apperance. Heres a girl who is being crucified for performing late term abortion and that my friends in un-american. And this chick is patriotic, anythign but clothes party wrapped around old glory, patriotic. God bless the USA and its justice system.

(#15) Octomom (Nadya Suleman): so you know my formula i like crazy bitches and crazy mouth and this bith fill both criterias, the only problem is that this crazy bitch has 10 kids, Sure Kate Gossling is a little bit softer in the eyes but thats like saying i want you to use a mallet rather than a hammer to crush my dick.

Casey dumps Octomon and her kids in the wooded area of failure without the need of duct tape, chloraform, or her parents cover up.

So thats my first round bracke,t next week we continue with:

(#1)Coco vs (#8)Andressa Soares

(12)Snookie vs (#4) Heidi Montag 2.0

(#6) Lady Gaga vs (#3) J-Woww

(#7) Kari ann Peniche vs (#2) Casey Anthony

PS.

Trying to post pictures but dont know how!